Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
Today in class was pretty awsome. I dont feel like i have to throw up and im actually paying attention. This is a first for friday
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize
