drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize
