we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
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