: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
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