Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
After the day I've had, I can't decide if donuts or fireball would be the appropriate priority.
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Note to self, the correct response when a guy tells you he likes you as a person is not "ew"
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
