I just overhead some girl saying that she's trying out for the real world so she has a backup if she doesn't get into teach for america...
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
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