I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I cant see straight, her clothes are all over my floor and I'm covered in bite marks... No I will not go to brunch with you
She's like the Jonah Hill of sorority sisters.
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
