put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
If she makes a move, pretend to have a seizure.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
Regardless of your intentions, deep throating a Twinkie is NOT sexy. You owe that poor cashier an apology the next time you pump gas.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize
