Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
Pls stop me from telling anyone else my broken blood-vessel + splint are "climax-related" injuries.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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