Say something about gay babies.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
