New low: just hacked my moms facebook
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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