When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I don't care how stoned you are, I'm not driving to a different state for a burrito
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Randomize
