Duck Duck Cougar?
Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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