She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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