But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
