I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
cat food counts as protein by the way
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I had a dream about masturbating with toys I can't afford.
My sex life and finances are equally in shambles.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Always keep a stash of tequila in your work desk. That is like adulting 101.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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