everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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