Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
Randomize
