there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
just took my abortion antibiotic with my martini. i no longer wonder how i got into this situation.
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
Have a booty call at 3am, stopped for tacos at 2:30. It's 2:55 and I still haven't ordered but can't jump the curb to get out of line because there is a cop in front of me. What am I doing with my life?
One sec I was having the time of my life, the next I was shitting water
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