I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
When health care reform is passed, I'm throwing a kegger
You are the reason we need health care reform
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
You told them to let you give him stitches claiming you were a certified nurse because you've taken plant biology classes
Sometimes I hate my life and then I remember I live in the WORLD CAPITAL OF RUM
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Just witnessed a fat waitress doing whipits in the back of a waffle house.. my life seems a little brighter..
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 608 share tweet
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I'm high on the exercise bike at the gym. I feel like Lance Armstrong
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
Randomize
