i miss you and i wish you were peeing between my legs right now. in a platonic way
Need sex. Gaining weight.
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
Do I really need this much space in my mouth?
Are you already high?
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I don't want sex or anything I just really need someone to appreciate how shiny my hair is
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
Stand and applaud for me. I have successfully masturbated in a Walmart changing room with the door wide open during normal business hours. I lead a very Charmed Life.
Randomize
