the new term for farting is butt boxing.
I am really glad that on the inside of a card from your grandparents you have transcribed the rules for circle of death
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
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