Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
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