Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Everything we own is covered in grass and KY
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
THAT IS NOT SOMETHING YOU TELL SOMEBODY THE FIRST TIME YOU MEET THEM IN THE DARK.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
