It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
false alarm. still invincible.
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
Just downloaded the entire Justin Bieber album sober.. I think you know how I'm doing.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
And now I'm drinking leftover wine in the grad lounge because fuck my life
I just realized now that you're pregnant we can't use alcohol as currency
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
I wore Yonce braids out last night and made out with a man and a woman #bowdown is right
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