your drunk exhusband is tryin to get with my drunk exgirlfriend. i think its funny. if you still talk to him dont say anything.
we're not divorced.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
Maybe I need a light up heart over my vagina like Christina aguilera to get the point across
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
He was so fat that he broke two of my ribs
Maybe it's time to stop screaming I'm a chubby chaser every time you enter a drinking establishment
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
Randomize
