if any two of us come back from the bar and aren't getting laid we will systematically destroy everything in the kitchen
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
Kellie accidentally ran into the car with two teenagers making out. made a big thud. there was a loud scream and she was gone...haven't seen her since
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I currently don't understand fingers.
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
