great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
