oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
HAPPY BIRTHDAY I ATE TOO MUCH OF AN EDIBLE AND TOLD MY BARISTA I LOVED HER
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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