i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
bubblegum was invented today. we're getting drunk. end of story.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
Randomize
