I just put a condom on my dildo so i wouldng get another uti....most depresIng moment of.my LIFE
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
We lost you in the mall, but to no surprise we found you waiting in line to sit on santas lap. You said you wanted to ask him for a pound of weed and a subway giftcard for xmas.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
just found out I was hugging strangers at the bar last night. there's photographic evidence. I know none of them
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
Randomize
