did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
I proposed and she said yes man.
You realize the irony of surrendering on independence day, right?
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
I love having hate sex.
i just threw up in the porta potty. i am in no condition to be guarding anyone's life rite now.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
I suppose we should both be prepared for the secret service to come visit us after this conversation. Hi NSA.
not ubering you a puppy
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
