I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
Pretty sure the waitress here is concerned about well being bc I've been here drinking by myself for 3 hours. If only I could show here FB so she'd know I'm not alone...
Randomize