3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
i cant get the smell of ass out of my nose
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
I'm making a sandwich topless right now. Remind me again why I don't have a boyfriend?
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