yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize
