What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
Are you going to eat tacos off the floor again?
Tolerating him while I'm not drunk is like trying to find a word that rhymes with orange
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Randomize
