im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
I woke up to a paper award certificate for best blow job and he was gone. You're welcome mystey man.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
I'm experimenting with sincerity
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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