Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
PAAAANTS ARE FOR AAAASSHOLES
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
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