hotel room ftw
is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize