WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
If I had your ass I would rule the world
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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