Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I'll never get why we had to sing the entire full house theme to the cab driver.... never drinking rum again.
Told my fifteen year old cousin's friend what to sext his girlfriend last night. He was scarred for life but she fucking loved it.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
