Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Randomize
