You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
i'm at a baby shower....never been happier to not be having sex currently
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Just participated in the saddest thing: Cheetos. Handjob. I have lost at life
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
I'm bleeding and have questions
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
