..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Also, making a white Russian with butterscotch schnapps instead of vodka is probably the best decision I've made in my entire college career.
Maybe I'm nitpicking, but that looked more like how one would jerk off an elephant than it did playing air guitar.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
