it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize