I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Why is everyone else growing up when I'm just crying, eating, and having pregnancy scares?
I won't apologize to a one balled man
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
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