when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
I figured you left because I was a shit show. Were you still there when I got locked in the bathroom and didn't know where I was? If not, that could have been a dream. I'm still not sure.
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
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