This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd tell u there's strippers to make you get here faster, but that would be a blatant lie... There's strippers here.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I woke up with a thorn in my belly button. A THORN!
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Willing booties have sort of a tractor beam for me.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
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