I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
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