Are u religion class? I'm on my way, I have cum in my hair. tell u later.
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
Ps, did you know if you google "drunk jenga", you're the first image that shows up?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up smelling like the ciroc you tried pouring into my mouth last night. I think my clothes are still soaked
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
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